Oh, I got a quite complicated relationship with my own writing (and, by extension, my creative expression as a whole, as I’ve been doing drawings more than I do writings)…
Most of the time I do enjoy it, especially when creativity manifests as this sudden stream-of-unconsciousness and leads me into rabbit holes of knowledge at 3AM (aka spiritual gnosis), often through the researching of specific fine details I’m intending to put within the text/drawing. Some of my drawings even induce me actual altered states of consciousness I wouldn’t experience otherwise (esp. when I draw Lilith as I “see” Her, anthropomorphically and strigimorphically).
But then I have this frequent realization that I’m way too verbose or “pedantic” to the neurotypical society, and my unfiltered artistic expression is very dense (requiring the viewer/reader to decode nested layers of symbolism and knowledge for it to make sense), even deliberately cryptic (as I sometimes imbue it with steganography and/or ciphers akin to those of “Cicada 3301 puzzles”), so I end up trying to keep most of my expression to myself; most of my art is unpublished… except art is a form of communication and a communication that doesn’t make it outside my headboard notepad/sketchbook (that is, beyond my and my dæmons’ awareness) would be considered, to my “Luciferic-apatheistic side of me”, merely an inner monologue with extra steps…
Oh, I got a quite complicated relationship with my own writing (and, by extension, my creative expression as a whole, as I’ve been doing drawings more than I do writings)…
Most of the time I do enjoy it, especially when creativity manifests as this sudden stream-of-unconsciousness and leads me into rabbit holes of knowledge at 3AM (aka spiritual gnosis), often through the researching of specific fine details I’m intending to put within the text/drawing. Some of my drawings even induce me actual altered states of consciousness I wouldn’t experience otherwise (esp. when I draw Lilith as I “see” Her, anthropomorphically and strigimorphically).
But then I have this frequent realization that I’m way too verbose or “pedantic” to the neurotypical society, and my unfiltered artistic expression is very dense (requiring the viewer/reader to decode nested layers of symbolism and knowledge for it to make sense), even deliberately cryptic (as I sometimes imbue it with steganography and/or ciphers akin to those of “Cicada 3301 puzzles”), so I end up trying to keep most of my expression to myself; most of my art is unpublished… except art is a form of communication and a communication that doesn’t make it outside my headboard notepad/sketchbook (that is, beyond my and my dæmons’ awareness) would be considered, to my “Luciferic-apatheistic side of me”, merely an inner monologue with extra steps…
Makes me think of some writers who wrote pages and pages, then scrunged and compressed it down to just one phrase that condensed it all…
Also, come share your art on Artshare! You can even make another account if you want.