Trump has cancer and is killing it with soda? Well, at least he’s treating it correctly. Donald, add bleach to your sodas for extra killing power. Lots of bleach.

Dad said “Mario Kart is a waste of time, son.”

That’s General son to you, Dad.

The only F-word I need from Trump “Files”, as in “Epstein Files”.

So, those Epstein files coming out yet?

May he stall for the shortest time possible. Amen.

I’m beginning to think the hardest job in the entire world is Secret Service Agent. I mean, c’mon, millions of lives are at risk, you’re armed, and he’s right there. Instant hero. /s

Edit: forgot /s. Obviously.

When she stands in her front lawn in Minnesota and waves her arms, waiting for Jebus to carry her to Washington (because aircraft=science=bad), we know who to follow.

Our leaders are so fucking stupid.

Yeah, this kind of thing has been popping up… well, since I started paying attention in the 1970s.

A friend of mine at that time had a great solution: “When they can’t pay my social security or anything else I’ve paid into, I’ll just take it in trade. I’ll take a fair-value amount of government land - maybe in Yellowstone, someplace nice - and at that point it’s mine. Good luck getting it back.”

Trump posted on social media after the announcement of Mueller’s death: “Robert Mueller just died. Good, I’m glad he’s dead.” The Republican president added, “He can no longer hurt innocent people!”

What an uber-douche. I read the morning news Every. God. Damned. Day. And the headline is never, “Trump is dead.”

But there’s always tomorrow.

Edit: I did not mean to change the focus from Mueller to Trump. Buuuuutttt… they might want to check his polonium levels…

Alternate title: “Handoff of classified documents comes with free drinks.”

“The masks are off,” Dmitriev wrote. “U.K. and EU warmongers are showing how deeply anti-Trump they really are. They tried to hide it for a long time, but now everyone can see it.”

Welcome to the club! Snacks are there on the table, take a few minutes to mingle and get to know everyone.

That question was posted before the appointment, but thanks!

Surrender from whom? You fucking blew up their fucking leader.

What ever happened to that Trump bounty? I hope it went away and didn’t rise to unimaginable wealth.

Why stop at that event? What about the classrooms that teach about “the war of Northern aggression”, or any of the other slanted views of history?

As opposed to the meticulous and detail-oriented training the previous recruits have excelled in demonstrating?

Seriously, up til now their training might have been: “If they have a face, aim for that place; Exercising their rights? That’s reason for fights.”

Given that most law enforcement stories lately (/s) are completely divorced from reality and fall apart with video evidence, I’d like to see the body cam of this. Now all we have to do is wait for the AI to generate some video that matches the report…

But Carr told reporters that the FCC was simply enforcing the rules on the books. “If you have a legally qualified candidate on, you have to give comparable air time to all other legally qualified candidates, and we’re going to apply that law,” he said.

This is interesting - the rules are for “equal time” but not “Equal time to answer the same interview questions”, which would be fun although we’ve seen how some folk can’t answer questions (cough Pam Bondi cough).

I wonder if the same rules should apply for advertising, since those are going out over networks? If a Grand Old Pedophile gets a 1-minute ad, should the network give a 1-minute space to an opponent?

Edit: Yeah, the rule says they gotta offer time “at the same rate”. That seems fair, I guess. As long as we’re still buying elections.

Oh, thank goodness. I need something to distract me from those awful Trump files. Which seem to show he raped multiple children, according to some who I believe.

Did she use the correct response, “Big asshole” ?

And they know exactly who is promoting this “fake news”, so stop it. /s