These are the Olympic stories I want to hear. Yeah, a guy won the decathlon with mismatched garbage shoes. Cool I guess. I’d rather hear about the heroic sprinter that somehow took gold despite getting their ass pounded so hard the night before that they saw god.
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I mean I’m given to understand they’re already fucking each other enough to deplete the condom reserves. Just film it and start handing out medals.
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These are the Olympic stories I want to hear. Yeah, a guy won the decathlon with mismatched garbage shoes. Cool I guess. I’d rather hear about the heroic sprinter that somehow took gold despite getting their ass pounded so hard the night before that they saw god.
That’s how you get me to watch the Olympics.
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