Surely the leopards would never eat MY face.

I love a good news day.

Go into an indigenous community like a First Nations reserve, or rural Africa where the people still practice subsistance hunting and tell them this.

Let me know how it goes. They’ll see it as bigotry. Deservedly so.

The sustainable hunter gatherers left on earth look poorly upon your high-and mighty opinions perched on top of a fossil fuel powered agricultural-industrial complex that has eliminated most wilderness and biodiversity for monoculture farms. Humans are about 36% of earth mamalian biomass. Livestock is about 60%. Wild mammals are down to 4%.

It’s a similar case for vegans. Their moral superiority is founded on an agricultural-industrial reality that while one of the superior options, practices an unsustainable method.

Your righteous indignation is an error. Your perspective is flawed because it’s anchored in a tiny worldview’s normalcy bias.

Don’t be that person. Something something, stones and glass houses.

A fair point, but I believe a mistaken one. Humans’ evolutionary niche is it’s intelligence. Our tools are an integral part of that.

From this perspective, would you say the lion hiding in the grass to ambush its prey is just cheating? For a fair fight it has to be in open terrain? We all use the gifts at our disposal.

To your point “OP” tools can easily scale to beyond fair chase. There is no line that separates what is and is not acceptable. Its up to the hunter to decide for themselves, and the public who regulates them. Within the hunting community, there are constant battles between bows vs rifles and even spear and atlatl “purists”.

Edit: I swear I’ve met more than one “barefister” too, but it was online, so I couldn’t tell if they were serious, or playing devil’s advocat.

There is no contention. We are completely agreed and I don’t believe I’ve said anything to the contrary.

Ethical hunters have a core principle referred to as “fair chase”. The animals have to have a reasonable chance to escape, or it’s an unethical slaughter, not a hunt.

For example, a dude with a bow or rifle in the forest, where the prey can run away is fair chase. It’s a battle of skill, and stealth. You have to outsmart the prey.

A dude with his buddies, drones or helicopters or fenced in “wildlife” preserve are not hunters. They are slaughterers. There is no fair chase.

If this person was a hunter, then he should be pleased his prey exercised its rights to fair chase, and give kudos for making the escape through him. A bold move worthy of recognition. In a life-and-death battle of wits, skill and instinct, the winner was worthy.

If this person was a slaughterer, then fuck him, he got what he deserved.

Either way, this is a 100% win.

Ironicaly, this is not the dumbest thing he’s ever said.

It’s a system. Not of Justice, but of oppression and extortion and naked power.

You are you! You can and must judge. For yourself, naturally.

Dom Perignon?

Double Penetration?

Donkey Punch?

Democratic Party?

Deep Purple?

Director of Photography?

Dense Patterns?

Dinner Parties?

Please give me your neighbours number so I can ask for clarification.

You can always rub one out. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) P.S. Should fix your door.

Global economic slowdown? No problem? Let me kidney-punch you in the tourism. Now it’s a problem!

Laws? How quaint.

In battleshits, it’s so you can keep your hands on the wheel and voice control the AI assisted turret cannon.

You: “Weapons, lock on to that red honda civic that just cut us off.”

AI: “Please confirm license ABC123”

You: “Confirmed”

AI: “Target Confirmed. Please select ammunition - Wet and Sloppy, High Density Penetrator, or Burnt and Crispy”

You: “Recommendations?”

AI: “The Civic’s front passenger window is open. Wet or burnt seem appropriate, however at this rate of speed wet and sloppy has a low probability of penetrating the cabin due to wind shear stress. Recommendation: burnt and cripsy.”

You “Confirm burnt.”

AI: "Firing Solution not yet possible. Please close the gap and avoid intermediate collateral objects.

You: *Drives with passion and skill closing the gap. “Weapons! Where’s my firing solution?”.

AI: “Target lock in 3…2…1…Lock” *Tone signals the duration of lock.

You: “Fire!”

AI: “Direct hit Sir! The burnt and crispy entered through the open passenger window and shattered on the front winshield. As a frangible ammunition the entire round was contained by the passenger cabin.”

You: “Enemy damage assessment?”

AI: “Unconfirmed estimates indicate the driver and all passengers are covered in fine particles of crispy burnt shit. The smell is likely unbearable resulting in the rapid deceleration you just observed. Total damage costs - 2 lost lunches, 2 loads of laundry and a level 5 car detailing required with a 5% chance of never getting the smell out due to ultra fine particles entering the ventilation system.”

You: “Excellent. People like this rarely learn their lessons the first time. Prepare to turn about and make a low speed anti-personel pass to pick off any stragglers. Ammunition - Wet and Sloppy. Fire on my mark.”

The vice president, who is was Catholic, discovers excommunication.

You can’t solve scalping when its a core function of LiveNation’s ecosystem. Scalping is the business model.

Two moving toilets stalls/cars. We agree, you just didn’t know it at first. ;)

That’s why its such a good joke! ;)

Even the stupidest novelties sometimes have the seeds of brilliance.

What starts with in-vehicle toilet may very well lead to the hottest high profit margin and must have accessory: Take a fresh in-car shit, then launch it at the driver who just wronged you.

"Keep your road rage off the streets and in the seats! "

The engineers dubbed it “Project Battleshits” but most of us doubt that will pass through marketing.