Did you know that dihydrogen monoxide kills more people than any other liquid? And yet, the government does nothing to ban it. This deadly liquid could be anywhere, even in your home!

You get struck by lightning

You laugh, but my son did something similar. He said “daddy I know you’re going through a hard time right now but I can help you carry your groceries” and I said “son, you’re 38 years old, why the hell haven’t you moved out yet?”

Are you gonna keep going until you’ve covered all the Pokemon?

Airports work like this. You arrive two hours before takeoff only to find out like half an hour before takeoff that the flight is delayed because there’s no plane.