I’m a gay man. I absolutely hate people who pander to us just as much as people who hate us.
The same should apply to trans groups, I sincerely doubt every trans individual wants to be placed on a pedestal at all times.
Result? Banned from a community.
Power trip confirmed 👍.
If a hypothetical trans person were to feel that the actions and attitudes of !Transfem@lemmy.blahaj.zone were too pandering, said HTP would be more than welcome to cease association with that community.
You posted a comment that went contrary to, if not the letter, the spirit of the rules of the community. Your unsolicited negativity was deemed detrimental to the curated experience there.
I have little doubt that the same sort of comment made by anyone else, be they trans or cis, masculine, feminine, or neuter, would be handled by an equivalent invitation to no longer take part in a community that they expressed such an antithetical attitude toward the general spirit of.
At best, BPR; I tend to believe that you commented with the intention of crying foul about the action that you already knew would result. Otherwise you were not cognizant of the climate in the community you commented in, and therefore YDI.
In other words: if you shit in the punch bowl, do not be surprised when you are kicked out of the party.
Antithetical would be to be bigoted. Saying that neutrality is preferred over pandering is not bigotry.
You saying what I wrote was antithetical is disingenuous if not dishonest. But I know you can’t stop yourself from bandwagoning because just like every other sheep in this comment section you see every difference in opinion as dissent from the hive mind.
Have an original thought.
I’ll feed you a bit, as a treat.
The only disingenuity or dishonesty in our exchange so far is your willful misinterpretation of what would be, in context, antithetical. In this discussion, it is anything in diametrical contrast to the letter and spirit of the community you were banned from. It is not for you to be the arbiter of what is or is not perferred there.
The community in question and others on LBZ practice a form of extreme acceptance. It is codified in the mtf community sidebar in the statements:
and
and
and
Your removed “challenge” to the tone of the original post falls in direct opposition to the stated guidelines for being allowed to contribute there. Even the recreated, possibly sanitized version you have presented here is clearly beyond what many LBZ communities find acceptable. Further argument to the contrary, coupled with your attempts to personally disparage anyone who does not agree with your erroneous position, only solidifies the notion that you are not operating in good faith.
If everyone is presenting a similar version of the same reasoning, that does not necessarily imply a hive mind; sometimes it just means you are an asshole.
“possibly sanitized” It was pretty much word for word. Not that you’re arguing in good enough faith to consider that in your “argument”.
If antithesis is anything that goes “against spirit of the community” then you’re wrong on so many levels that it’s not even worth explaining. But in the off-chance your occipital lobe hasn’t fried itself from so much bandwagoning, antithetical means diametrically opposed. Not slightly against the spirit of.
You can mental gymnastics your way into any point, still doesn’t mean you’re right. Clearly.
I actually agree with this statement in regards to neutrality versus affirmation, though I don’t think it actually applies in this case.
I’m just going to unpack some definitions. I’m not going to use the loaded word “pandering.” Some people will value neutrality, which I define as being treated the same as everyone else while ignoring any recognization of someone’s identity in a marginalized group, over positive affirmation, which I define as people paying special considerations toward someone in a way that directly validates a person’s identity. Pandering, a different but occasionally related term, refers to a person who uses positive affirmation for personal gain without necessarily believing in the identity or person they’re affirming.
Genuine pandering is a problem, and examples include greenwashing, performative feminism, and rainbow capitalism. Right-wingers sometimes falsely accuse people or organizations of “pandering” when said people or organizations genuinely believe what they preach. There is no evidence that OOP was pandering, and an abundance of evidence that OOP genuinely believed what she wrote.
Some people prefer neutrality, and that’s okay if they don’t demand that everyone must adopt neutrality. Some people want people in their lives who are affirming, which is also okay if they associate themselves with people who genuinely want to be affirming.
The issue here is that you invaded another group and insisted they must live by your standards. You wrote here that you “hate people who pander” and that since you personally don’t like that, “the same should apply to trans groups.” I believe that is bigoted, but I rate it like a 3 out of 10 on the Bigot Scale.
I’m not telling the gay male community that their gayness must be affirmed, if that’s not what they want. I have no right to. It’s up to all of us whether neutrality or affirmation feels right for us, and then communicate that accordingly. In my case, I prefer affirmation with close friends, but neutrality in the workplace.
I’ll say that I’ve seen so much transphobic stuff with “I’m a gay man” as an opening line, and it’s getting exhausting. LBT without the G lmao (/sarc, of course, as I’d rather we all find ways to coexist).
How’s that for an original thought?
Thank you.
You’re the only person here who genuinely engaged.
I won’t carry on with this discussion because clearly people (not you) are out for blood. And don’t interpret this as me assuming you’ve sided with me and then lashing out, I know full well you mostly stand against what I said. But you at least read what I said. Which can’t be said for many other here.
So thanks again.
The one person you deemed good and you refuse to talk to them. Big red flag of bad faith.
Because of people like you. Like I mentioned in my reply about people out for blood (you).
That’s right, calling you out for being weird is wanting you harmed. Give me your blood! I feast on it! I desire it!
Love that me wanting equal and fair treatment of everyone instead of fake positivity is “being weird”. I’m well aware your entire group would actually wish me harm if I got doxxed.
Doesn’t need to be physically, you clearly enjoy jumping on the “fuck him” train without second thought as to what I’m saying.
I went in with an open mind, I saw you deserved it, and then saw you just kept posting your own ass again and again.
Its funny you think that comment was actually in your corner 😂
Every comment you make has demonstrated less and less reading comprehension
If you read what I wrote and interpreted it as that, you’re the one with piss poor reading comprehension, idiot.